It's unsettling to feel inspired and angry at the same time. Last week, I was lucky enough to be able to spend some time on the phone with Kala Clark, a high school senior in Maine who succeeded in having the state legislature pass a new law recognizing the right of siblings separated in foster care to visit and spend time together. Kala, who was moved to action by being separated from her two little brothers when she went into care, is articulate, motivated, intelligent -- and still sad about what she and her brothers missed.

This morning, I found the May/June issue of Represent! in my mailbox. Represent!, a publication of Youth Communication, is written by teens in foster care. This new issue zeroes in on the same painful reality: while keeping siblings together when possible, and maintaining contact between them when it is not, is a stated priority of child welfare departments around the country, the truth is that in most places, not enough is being done to safeguard this important relationship. These young people write powerfully about how they experienced the loss of contact with their brothers and sisters, how angry they were, how damaging it was to their efforts to succeed in school and life, how much it still hurts years later.

Something that came out both in my talk with Kala and in several of the stories in Represent! is that the sibling bond in troubled families is often extra strong. Before kids are taken into care, they've often spent years raising each other. The older children become the ones who change the diapers, pack the lunches, go to the school plays, clean the clothes and kiss the skinned knees of their little brothers and sisters. So when child welfare agencies step in and separate these sibling groups, the pain is intense -- as is the guilt, especially among the older sibs.

Certainly many agencies and child welfare workers do a lot to try and keep the connection alive, and it's not a simple assignment. But this is an issue that needs to move further up the priority list...along with the legal issues around sibling visits after a child is legally adopted. These kids lose so much, they should be allowed to hang on to each other.